There's a jungle in our backyard

One corner of our backyard we haven't cut and the grass has grown beautifully high.  The kids love playing in the tall grass.  When I stated I was going to cut it Jax said, "No mom, then we wont be able to hide in it."  So it's stayed as part of backyard play.

26 weeks of A-Z

Well, we did it... and I loved it.  Who knew I would ever love teaching 4-5 year olds getting ready for Kindergarten.  I created my own routine and curriculum and I think it turned out pretty well.

I made binders for each kid with picture collages of our funness, their work/writing/art, and a love letter from me.


Talon James, I did this for you and I'm so happy we did it together.  I loved seeing your enthusiasm for learning. You are such a social bug and this was the perfect combination for you.  Even Colton jumped on the bandwagon and participated just like he was 4 yrs.  I hope you'll keep your smiles on this up coming school year and fill your mind with great things...just "for the love of learning."

The year through pics:

"Learning to Dance in the Rain"...year 30

Remember a year ago when I set a new goal for my 30's..."Come what may and love it and watch me dance in the rain" I believe is what I said...

So how was I doing...

It's been hard, definitely not coming naturally, but I've given it a try.

I purchased a cute sign and have it above my desk where I sit everyday to do some form of work on the computer.

Spent a month preparing a whole Relief Society Meeting/Activity about it.  Tried to get sisters from our ward to dance in the rain with me so we could make this flyer and a music video (watch below).

The RS activity went well- here's how the evening flowed:

Learning to DANCE in the rAiN

6:00 Sierra- write statistics & quotes on board

Kasey & Virginia- set up lemonade and muffins

Christy- set up craft station

Amber- decorate with umbrella’s & rainboots

6:30 Amber- Welcome

Opening Song & Prayer

Virginia- Neighbor positive comment activity 

6:40 Sis. Aliki (RS Pres & therapist)- How is it we become what we think?

How does God view us (ideas posted around the room)

Word Card

Hillary Weeks Blog Entry

Write 5 positive words about ourselves

Mother’s do this for your children, Wives do it for your spouse

6:50   What influences our thinking.  Place items in big bowl (brain).  3min. lessons. What they brought that inspires them, they can share under one of these categories.

Kasey D. Media (Internet, TV, Movies)

Sierra S. Music

Barbara H. Literature (including scriptures)

Tina W. People

Christy S. Environment (our homes, work place, where we hang out)

Katie M. Exercise

Virginia N. Nutrition

7:20 The Holy Ghost & Choices (Amber)

ACTION PLAN 

Decide:  Is this a thought from God or the Adversary

Choose:  Will this thought invite the Holy Ghost?

Act:  How will you change your thought 

• sing a primary song in my head
• quote a scripture or thought
• think of someone you love like your children or spouse
• change environment
• pray
• change to positive affirmation statement (view list)

7:25  Staying positive amongst trials?  (Adalia Redd- lost her husband last summer in helicopter accident)

Give yourself the best chance by surrounding yourselves with all the good things we discussed.

With God all things are possible!

“Dancing in the Rain”- video

7:30  Craft w/ Christy

Make scrap flower for hair, jewelry, or clothes

7:45 Closing prayer

Refreshments

8:00   Clean up 

I remember one day while filming literally just yelling, "so what if my husband's going to be deployed for 9 months --- I can totally do this!"  I had just miscarried a week or two previously and was still quite hormonal/emotional, the Army unexpectedly whisked Doug away into field training and wasn't home and I was literally fighting some serious negative thoughts on this whole deployment thing...this was the worse case scenerio of deployments in my mind (though I have friends who's situations are way worse) and then all the what if he doesn't come home thoughts were creeping around.  This same day while we danced in the rain one of my good friends, Virginia's husband had just left unexpectedly for a 9 month deployment a few weeks previously and another friend Sierra was diagnosed with breast cancer then it went away...miracle and another friend Kasey was miserably sick with her first child.  Each of us going through something, and trying to reflect on the positive as we "danced in our rain."  I really felt this whole activity came at a time I was fighting negative thoughts and was an opportunity to live what we were about to preach. (p.s. I loved my RS activity planning committee)

This whole idea was inspired by Elder Wirthlin's conference talk titled, "Come what may and love it" and from Hillary Week's T.O.F.W. clicking experiment.  (Watch below)



Video disclaimer:  I have a very talented videographer friend who kindly threw this together for us last minute as she was moving and had literally one night to do it and feels she could have done it much better with more time and footage, so she doesn't want me to give her credit.  Nonetheless it fulfilled it's purposes just fine...though embarrassing me a bit...really wish I could have convinced someone else to play the lead as I'm NO actress and felt funny being in front of the camera like this.

"I'll go where you want me to go, dear Lord...

over mountains or plains or sea...I'll stay in Tennessee while my husband's deployed, since this is where I feel I should be." (to be sung to the tune of the hymn "I'll go where you want me to go")

So all along my plan was to moved to Utah when Doug was to be gone.  And as circumstances would have it, Doug will be gone the entire school year which would work out nicely to move to Utah and have the boys in school.  I thought about all the positives and weighed out the negatives.

Pros:
1. My kids could create bonds with their grandparents and aunt/uncles.
2.  I could create stronger bonds with my siblings.  2 will be seniors, 1 will be turning 16 and a Jr., and the other two will be turning 12 and 9 this upcoming year.  I could attend football games, tennis matches, musical theater productions, ballroom dance competitions, soccer games, baseball games, play board games, and have long chats about boys with my sister who I would love to be there for during this time in her life.
3. I could attend the temple frequently.
4. I could eat Sunday dinners with my family.
5. I could enjoy all Utah has to offer for kids/families.
6. I could play with Jana and Cristina who live close to my mom's house now.
7. I could sing songs on the piano with Hunter and he could give my kids mini piano lessons.
8. I could pamper my super stressed, over worked mother with her cleaning angel (I'd hire her) and make meals for her family a couple times a week.  I could help in her garden and remind her that she's darling in every way.
9.  I could live in my Mom's basement apartment.
10. I would be able to see my Dad, Lori, Devin, Hannah, Gavin, Blake, my Mom, Dan, & Hunter regularly...how glorious would that be!
11. Save $.

Cons:
1. Move out my house that I love.
2. Don't know exact day when Doug will leave for 9 months and what if it ends up beings 2 months after I move to Utah...that would be awful.
3. Have to find another house to move into when he gets back.
4. Family would witness my weaknesses as a mother and personally.
5. Could create rifts between family relationships.
6. Have to watch my kids like a hawk that they don't destroy property that's not theirs or bother someone.

And then something happened amongst my planning to move to Utah...out of the blue I just started thinking about staying...."why am I thinking about staying in TN"....I'm super excited to go on my Utah adventure, why am I even considering it...is this from the Lord because I know it's not what was on my radar...

After much thought, prayer, more thought, prayer, fasting, etc. I feel like I'm supposed to stay.  WHY?  I don't know. But I just can't help but think this was the whisperings of the Spirit prompting me.

So now the Pros are:
1.  Stability and it doesn't matter when Doug leaves and comes home...we'll be here.
2.  Don't have to pack up and move and find another house later.
3.  Great friends here.
4.  Opportunity to serve in the church and to stay productive and busy.
5.  Will only have one kid at home between 7:45-3:15...what will that be like???
6.  Ready to go out and find the 100 sisters that are on our roster that we don't know who they are.
7.  And the biggest pro is PEACE...knowing I'm where the Lord needs me to be (even if it's not where I would have put me).
8.  Won't have to worry about my kids in my house or keeping on good terms with family.

Cons:
1.  Spending more money because yes, I plan on visiting Utah.  And yes, I plan on hiring sitters OFTEN.  And I think I'll hire someone to mow my lawn and maybe clean my house once a month too.
2.  Missing out on all the family bonding that could occur.
3.  Might get lonely, overwhelmed, or have to deal with all the crazy thoughts I have about being alone in my house at night and what was that noise...will have to get in some more 9mm shooting time in.  (Doug will like that)
4.  Have to deal with taking a kid to the ER and drag all the others with me when it's 2am. Or other emergency situations on my own.
5.  Boys will probably get a tired mommy who doesn't give them as much attention as they need/want.

I'm currently praying a righteous Priesthood holder and his wonderful family will move within walking distance of us...or on my street (even better)!

I do know that the Lord's plan is always better than mine.  He is all knowing and if He says stay, then I say ok.  I know God's plan will always lead to joy and peace and I'm sure I'll feel closer to Him through this experience as I'll have to rely so much more on Him to give me strength to be the mother I want to be for my children.  I know He loves us and will be there with us through this journey.